Eight months ago, actress Nia Long welcomed her second child, son Kez Sunday, with boyfriend Ime Udoka. Kez joined Nia’s older son, 10-year-old Massai. Nia was engaged but never married Massai’s father, and now Nia isn’t in a hurry to marry Ime, either.

“Marriage is not a priority for me. I’m not saying I’ll never do it; It’s just not where we are as a family. I’ll be at home with my man, having a perfectly loving time, and I’ll see all these comments on some site about how wrong I am for not being married,” she says. “I don’t feel less loved or less loving because I’m not married.”

Nia confessed she’s never seen a successful marriage, but she has been working hard to maintain positive relationships with both of her sons’ fathers.

“Massai’s dad and I have had the most challenging times, and I wasn’t always sure we wouldn’t end like my mother and father. But we’ve arrived at a place where I can truly say he’s not a baby daddy, he’s my friend, finally. He is an amazing father.

“I’m a lot calmer. Less clingy and demanding. When Ime has to be gone for long stretches at a time, as he had to the first few months after Kez was born, I took it as an opportunity to nest. It had been a minute since I had an infant and I had to get back into the rhythm of being a new mom. I really enjoyed having the space to do that at my own pace.”

Nia sounds like she’s happy with her life just the way it is. That’s the most important thing, isn’t it?

Photos by FayesVision/Owen Beiny/WENN